epicly carnage: "The Sound That Comforts The Soul In All Enlightened Beings"

although it was Smiths/Morrissey night tonite, numbers were thin on the ground. I got a call from r kid saying he was out on the razz in the Rose & Crown with his mates from the Ashes Trip so I tore over to Ramsbottom instead.

Gilkes was there. He became the Nth member of the Sharpe Jacket Appreciation Society. And the fucker ripped another button off it- its nearly war torn

Scouse Marc was there too

I taught them the 'look dangerous game' but they didnt quite get it, and just pissed themselves

eventually they became experts

for some reason someone thought it be good to hit the sambuca's early on

me and Pove couldn't be happy for it

Gilko spilt Sambuca on Scouse Marcs jeans. Later on it went as hard as a shinpad...

and on his arm...

this bird was getting sleazed on by Gilkes. She had bigger arms than me so she failed my quota

more sambuca? no?

roving hands...the Nick Schofield way...

after a while me and Pove went into Ramsbottom to get some cash. When we got back they had closed the doors at 21:15 which was fucking nuts. Luckily my gender non-specific look was remembered by the pisshead monitoring the door and me and Pove got let back in

she had feet like Stig of the Dump, yet Gilkes felt obliged to lick them

scousers on the rob...

As I was scanning the karaoke book, Gilkes knocked a full pint on the book and it funnelled onto my groin and flares. I was naturally delighted

as I was helping pove get a round in, (on top of apologising to 2 gay guys who had been assaulted by pove who drunkenly bumbled into them) I chatted to these two heroes

he had a nepalese tattoo which said "The Sound That Comforts The Soul In All Enlightened Beings"
he then said I would never remember that cos I was destroyed so he typed it into my mobile for me. that guy is perceptive!