epicly carnage: "I'm just gonna drink as many double vodka redbulls as I can, then throw up"

After my boozy one in Ramsbottom, I had to trek across Manchester to get to Fallowfield for sadderday nite

I was gonna park my car and get the bus in with jobber to meet the rest. I got stuck in traffic though

turns out martyn was joining us for some epic carnage. I was half tempted to stay at theirs cos Athletic Club were playing Valencia next

We met the rest of them in Aqua. They seem to enjoy employing a hundred staff for what is essentially a shit and quiet bar

These two onionheads decided to snort tequila before we got there. Even though Karl is a doctor and said it was a foolish thing to do

Moz seemingly went out and bought a Mr Men book. It is one which sums up Nick apparently

DC tried to usurp that by wearing a sown in vest to a shirt. It doesnt even have a back to the vest. Its beyond reasoning

Then we tore over to 42's. I tried to get a discount using a different clubs leaflet.
dc had left by then in his policy of going home when we go to 42s

secrets

Martyn clocked the two birds from Shameless in the club. I asked him to sum up his excitement...

By this time him and bigman both kept buying shitloads of double vodbulls. They were both just destroyed
I was so behind, I just bought myself out of the round

then dc reappeared. He did a turnaround and went to Bedlam before coming here for some carnage

bigman was being a pest to these two birds. Can you tell?

"I'm just gonna drink as many double vodka redbulls as I can then throw up"

this bird was a full hit lesbian. She struck up some sort of rapport with Karl. When she talked to jobber later, Martyn flew into a rage and starting saying stuff like "don't you touch him!"

dc was given freedom to produce some emo shots for Epicly Carnage

then we went to the bar. the hired gun looked like Ugly Betty

this bird was a fucking dick. She wouldn't make room for us to sit down on our booth and just sat on the end looking miserable.
According to dc, she had just been left by her boyfriend but I didn't give a shit, I couldnt be compassionate for her

I took martyn onto the dancefloor and this bird was loving the craic. I offered her some of my drink and she said 'is it spiked?' to which I said yes. She still drank it. Then I asked for my beads back and she went apeshit and threw them on the the floor :(

Mart also turned into drunken matchmaker for me and encouraged me to goose some nice bird. She looked like she had LSE and I got my sleaze on. I seem to remember telling her that I was only gonna buy her a double vodbull (?!)
Unfortunately I lost concentration after a while cos I was hammered and dropped the ball. she disappeared into the smoke ...

Bigman, DC and karl went for a curry. Bigman went AWOL from that little excursion and ran off into the night. I got told by martyn that we were leaving so I went outside. However noone was there and I had to wait for half an hour until jobber came out