Saturday, 19 January 2008

'I quite like the girl with the disabled face and broad shoulders'


This is likely to be the last entry in a while. I'm considering renaming it Epicly Hiatus or Exiled Carnage

so on my return from Scotland I tore round to jobbers flat before hitting town. Moz joined us in his latest ensemble

he was drinking a bottle of fosters with a citrus twist. It tasted of lies

his footwear was a joy though. The boot material felt like vulcanized rubber and had a feminine heel to it. They were definately mens boots though. definately.

after a couple of beers and light banter we got the bus from Fallowfield into Piccadilly Sq before nine o'clock

Princey was wearing the same scarf that I own, but luckily I had left it with the savages up north

the bus window's sexuality was androgynous

we got to the Star & Carnage at nine and were faced with a downpour, a locked door and an empty pub with no music on

we had banter like we were boozing in a library. Moz wore his newly purchased kaftan with the O(+> hanging out of the top to complete the look

I did an S and hadnt eaten all day so bought more snacks than life. I started with the Rolls Royce of nuts

then moved onto the Ford Mondeo of crisps

I also moved away from my normal look with the Sharpe jacket and onto the leather jacket bandwagon

it has epaulettes so I was happy

on the subject of fashion, bigman sported his Karl Kennedy band t-shirt for the world to see

Dr Karl turned up and had promised us 'a surprise'. We guessed that it could be (amongst others) one of the following:
- he was coming' out';
- he was wearing a new item of clothing;
- he was sporting his giant flares.

turns out the man was wearing his missus's knickers. the little deviant...

we all look delighted to be there

there were some goons at the pub's 'Smile' night that made me and moz look conservative

the booze didnt get any better. In fact it was probably as bad as the pints in The Old Monkey

jobber was choking back the delight in drinking his lager

dangerous
emo dangerous?
the hairiest man in medicine

I can't work out if the photo was taken to capture the rear or the bag
me and Moz were the only ones who had blue wristbands. the others all said that we were given those ones because of our butchness
turns out we were given the previous nights colour so it had nothing to do with gender non-specifics

white wristbands were for queers
for some reason moz made a drink out of dr pepper. it tasted like a war crime

disgruntled
princey attempted some nick schofield 'disgust' poses
and the 'emotion' pose
emotion mk 2
?
dr karl spotted some bird and announced that he 'quite liked the girl with the disabled face and broad shoulders' he then pointed her out to have a ponytail which he remarked was 'alluring'. Its a wonder the man has a bird with such insightful comments like that

after some double dark rum and carnage we hit the stairs and prowled theback of the dancefloor for a bit

I got raped by the fruity. Not literally, because it doesnt have sex organs or a forceful nature
I'm clearly lacking blogging match fitness seeing as I completely missed the dancefloor snaps. I'm gonna throw in a DC embellishment and say we all got our neck on with swedish models. Apart from karl who pursued the spaz women with fat backs.
I think dc suggested some curry carnage which everyone signed up for. Then as we headed into the gaff Moz did a turnaround and leapt into a taxi home
this is where we went
I got on the water bandwagon and ordered a chicken sizzler. jobber did the same I think. We were hoping for it to be like the Mogul but it was pretty dogdirt. You cant beat the best though

the rest went back home and I crashed at jobbers. His bro has got some mad punchbag slapbang in their lounge area

this was on the cards to watch but instead we plucked for....




O(+>..............

Like the His Purple Majesty I have some entries in the vaults that I will release when I get the urge to blog back again. And I have an Epicly Carnage Awards Ceremony and a few specials that will be winging its way on here in the coming weeks until I get the material (and motivation) to continue Epicly Carnage.

May U live 2 see the Dawn.......

(TO BE CONTINUED........)