Nazi Love

the sight of this man's afro could only mean one thing...

some of the crew had come up to see me

we started it like we started most things. A game of pro eves

tolstoy gave me a present. She even does home visits!

after some booze and PES, we watched the football and I came up with some plans for their time here

before we set of for booze I responded to McIlroy on msn with a quote from Peep Show

I took them to my favourite bar, Elliots.

unfortunately for jobber, it was kareoke night...

to be fair, the quality of singing was good. And the scope wasn't too bad.

ooh......

the worlds worst genepool?

staying in Prestwick, we moved onto Flanagans

S was already complaining about the xmas period. He can't be happy for the festive season

crack at the mick eh?

none of the clubs were anywhere near busy- we were told so by the nice bouncers. Instead we witnessed some more amazingly good kareoke (even jobber agreed) and I managed to capture S giving a xmas tree spiteful glances

Madisons was our last destination

it was reasonably busy

we mainly drank vodka/waters and the odd slush puppy and vodka

I managed to pull a stroke face after one round of the booze

Tolstoy's hair was causing a stir throughout the night. He would walk past jocks and they would stare in fascination then whisper to one another

his peacocking grabbed the attention of these lot

me and S swooped in for a bit and chatted to some teens who were after a party. We left them with jobber and tolstoy to go to Subway

they lost track of them in the end, but we weren't bothered

mainly cos we were on course to eat some subway carnage

when we got back to mine, the mattresses were put on my floor so it looked like I had a load of Ukranian illegals sleeping in my room

it was difficult for me to get my essentials out of my cupboards

this man decided on ricecakes covered with tobasco sauce. An rare combination for a rare man

this man bought prawn cocktail crisps just to spite me

Purple Rain was put on for bedtime. It was on a good three times that night

(To be continued...)

Glasgae

the next day was spent hungover watching Nathan Barley on DVD etc

after a while we needed food (and Pove needed diesel) so we trundled off to the retail park and got a KFC. We got odd looks in there but I put it down to the locals sniffing us out as English. Then it dawned on us after we'd eaten that we managed to walk into KFC through the fire exit

we got the train into Glasgow from Prestwick town

it was absolutely hammering it down

once in the city we went to an 80's themed bar/club that my landlord Murray reccommended. It was fucking nuts

Its called the REFLEX (you didnt expect me to capture it all on the tv screen did you?)
the dancefloor had mirrors around it and more glitterballs than life itself
we stood off the dancefloor and I thought I was getting looks from some mature on it. Then Pove pointed out that I was hovering over her seat where her bag was so she was probably just thinking I was a tinker

they got pictures of Mr T SUCKA

and the Knight Rider. Unfortunately you dont get expletives from KITT at nearby punters

after an hour or two we went to Capitol to meet Mcilroy and Kyran

Kyran was tired and did a Moz on us. Turns out his early dart was because he's all loved up...
after Capitol we went off to ABC, but the queue was massive so we went to another club down the road

drinks were pretty cheap so we caned the spirits and mixers

it was rammed so we stayed near the bar like good little alcoholics when drinks are cheap

for some reason they had a crocodile protruding out of the balcony over the dancefloor

they had loads of sarky signs on the club pillars

one of them had a poster to see the Messiah

naughty

I dont whether she was applying for that position or just had her finger up

I didnt realise Aberneen were in the UEFA Cup this year

lechery

I papp'd out of the scene by mcilroy

necking

they never fail to remind you where you are in world

next day saw me sleeping in a penthouse style apartment in the city centre. It was like a greenhouse cos we were pissed and forgot to put the blinds down

I was destroyed, but luckily a bacon sarnie for me (and a cuppa tea for Pove) sorted it

me and him were debating which way Manchester was

I'm gonna say its that way

or that way

we got the bus back home cos the trains were bust. Kyran takes a small suitcase with him when he stills with Mcilroy cos he ends up for staying days on end


I had a nightshift to get to in an hours time. Pove had a four hour drive instead...

luckily I had teen angel Rosie Webster to keep me occupied on the journey